Wisdom 17:3 And, while they thought to escape notice in their secret sins, they were scattered under a dark veil of oblivion, being horribly afraid, and having been disturbed with great astonishment.
The book of Wisdom is an Apocryphal book found in many authorised Catholic bibles, and in certain editions of the protestant KJV. A blog on the Apocrypha is in theworks, but for now, think of it like a pastoral (Osteen, TD Jakes, CS Lewis) book.
This passage strikes me. Everybody sins, and most sin openly and proudly, but this passage describes the fear and anxiety of sins we hide because they are our little treasures. They can more or less affect our friends and family. Pornography, the cigarette you hide from your significant other (I wouldn’t call smoking a sin, but hiding it is), the jealousy engendered for more successful co-worker, and the trash you talk about him. It highlights a need. Nothing in “darkness” can be found, except to be tripped over, or to slam your little toe in to it. How can I grow if I can’t find my sin? But what if somebody shines a light on it for me? Pastors an priests can do just that. A good pastor will gladly listen to your frustrations, and hear your confessions; he will help you develop a practical plan of action to grow above where you are, and inquire about your progress. A good Christian brother or sister can do the same thing, and will ask for help in shining light on their sins.
Not every pastor or priest is good, though, and some won’t understand your problem, and that is ok. Keep looking until you find that person who understands and will help you grow
Don’t keep yourself in fear any more. Pray, and find light.